Man, I hate it when a show is sold out because some Fred Durst looking motherfucker and a gang of his fag-bashing, baggy pants and backwards baseball cap wearing cronies, who have no life to live, get in line in front of you at Tower or GI Joes or wherever and buy up all the god damned tickets for a show you’re desperate to see. These are the guys who have only heard ‘Junkie’ once, and constantly scream for Zia to take off her top. Well, hey, this time, we want to make sure the gigs are packed with cool people. That’s why we’re making tickets to our US tour available online to Warhols fans before they go on sale anywhere else. Tickets go on sale Friday, July 18th at Noon Eastern/9am Pacific. See SHOWS for the dates. Nice one.

There are a lot of things going on right now, so you may want to get a pen. First things first, have you seen our new barbecue? It’s out of control.

On July 21, we will be in Koln (Cologne) for a special performance on Radio Eins. That should be pretty cool; we’ve met a lot of amazing people this year in Germany. On the 24th, we will be on XFM in London for a special live happening. After that, we’re flying all the way to Oz, for some special performances there, as “You Were The Last High” is released on the 28th. The 30th, we’re going to be on Sydney’s Triple J for a special performance, followed by a gig at theMetro on the 31st, on Channel V on August 1st, Melbourne’s Hi Fi on the 3rd, acoustic performances on Nova 100 and Triple M on the 4th, and The Panel TV show in Sydney on the 6th.

Gulp.

Then we get to go home and get ready for our US tour. Conan O’Brien on the 15th, some radio shows here and there before we open the tour in L.A. at the Sunset Junction Street Fair on August 24. Confirmed dates are listed at SHOWS, if you have the time to wt for the page to load.

Oh, and remember, our new record Welcome To The Monkey House is released in the US on August 19th. And for those of you who ask if the US release is different than the International release? We would have to say ‘oh yes’.

Courtney says: “What happened to the hot pics you all took of us while we were in Europe? You were supposed to send them to Gothman. Come on.”

Our show with Roxy Music on July 18th has been canceled. The next scheduled gig in Britain will be as guests of David Bowie this November.

We shot the video for our next single, ‘You Were The Last High’, yesterday. Though we wish not to spoil the surprise of the video’s concept, we’re pretty sure you must have seen something like this classic struggle ‘between’ ‘love’ and ‘war’ somewhere before.

If you’re Neil Armstrong, Mr. Spock, or Nick Rhodes, yeah.

So, our old pal David Bowie comes to us and says, “Hey, I have this tour coming up this fall, I would love it if you guys would play with me.” To which we say, “Sure.” Mr. Bowie’s “A Reality Tour” kicks off on October 7th, and winds through The Continent before ending on November 26th.

If most words are to be believed, we will release our next single, “You Were The Last High”, on July 28th of this year. We think you will be hearing the tune on radio well before that date, but what do we know?

We regret to announce that the American release date our new record, Welcome To The Monkey House, has been pushed back once again. The record will now hit shelves in the US on August 19th. While we really cannot divulge the details behind this decision to push the record back, we can safely say that the release of another Frank Sinatra compilation has nothing to do with it.

In case you were hip-a-mo-tized by our new yellow surrounding and completely blanked it (it’s okay, it happens to the best of us), we have a brand new record we like to call Welcome To The Monkey House. You may want to look into this if you, say, worship The Dandy Warhols and the ground they walk on. But what is this, you say? You live in North America and cannot find this record anywhere? Crying shame! Who is responsible for this outrage? Well, because of “peripheral” elements throwing their weight around, the North American release of Monkey House was moved back to August 5th. I know, I know. Hold my hand, everything will be alright.

Hey ho. We’re going to be on French radio Franceinter on May 27th at 9pm (GMT +1). What, you say? Your radio has become infested with a nest of spiders and you fear turning it on will kill them? Don’t worry about it, baby. The broadcast will also be online. Just travel to RadioFrance and click on ‘Ecouter en direct” and your spiders are safe…for now..